I was performing comedy in between strippers at two o’clock in the afternoon” – Vir Das: Part 1

He says he’s vain, a sex addict and a man who has factually stopped the business of orange juice in India, or we’d like to believe. Demure might be the last adjective you’d pick to describe Vir, but ask him about the hookers in Hong Kong and he gets loose-trousered. Actually, Read More">any man would. ThenRead More

He says he's vain, a sex addict and a man who has factually stopped the business of orange juice in India, or we'd like to believe. Demure might be the last adjective you'd pick to describe Vir, but ask him about the hookers in Hong Kong and he gets loose-trousered. Actually, any man would. Then he tightens up and talks about his gig in the strip club. Ever heard about a man with the casual delivery of absurd or obnoxious statements, and it gets excellent results? Welcome Vir Das - India's numero uno stand up comedian who may have just ruined your sex life. Kidding! Vir has enormous faith in his power to win over people, which is just as well, since he spent most of his teenage life in the United States as a door man, washing dishes, dating women and making his daily two minute appearance at a local pub doing his stand up acts where getting 'booed' wasn't an option...till he found his niche. But it's only after you've spent an amusing one hour conversational wander through Das's uniquely frenzied, extreme and bizarre career that you find out the truth, the truth that yielded more than just a few usable anecdotes. I'm just using a part of it in this Bollywood Hungama's part one of the two part special. We stand up to salute the man, Vir Das. Actually, f*** it… we're better off seated! Let the laughter begin. Vroom Vroom Vir!

"You Americans are ignorant redneck hicks. Indians are very important in your life because without them you'd be starving, stranded, stupid"
I was a door man next to a place called Mikes which was two blocks down from where I used to work. They used to have 'amateur nights' where everyone was allowed for two minutes each to perform in front of the live audience. I was horrible because I was trying to be funny and tell jokes which a comedian should never do. I was 'booed' off for fifteen weeks in a row till I snapped and said, 'You Americans are ignorant redneck hicks. Indians are very important in your life because without them you'd be starving, stranded, stupid' and I got my first laughs.

"I was performing comedy in between strippers at two o'clock in the afternoon"
In fact, I've even performed in a strip club. I was a comedian between the strippers (laughs) and that too in the afternoon. At two o'clock I was doing this thinking that this has to be my lowest point and my career has gone to its zilch. The funny thing was that the tuxedo I was wearing was retro because I could only get my hands on that and afford it on for seven dollars. I was doing comedy in that in the strip club, can you believe it? Life can't be worse than this! (Laughs).

Read More">“Russell Peters and I are like the two cows on the opposite sides of the road” Russell Peter and I know each other. I am a big fan of his work. He did what he did and it can’t be done again. I am not a ‘race’ guy and not a ‘topical’ guy. I amRead More

"Russell Peters and I are like the two cows on the opposite sides of the road"
Russell Peter and I know each other. I am a big fan of his work. He did what he did and it can't be done again. I am not a 'race' guy and not a 'topical' guy. I am an 'observational' guy. So my comedy is all about drinking 'chai', women, sex, sh**, men, etc etc. That's what interests me. Russell Peters went 'race' completely. Now, a lot of comedians are doing the 'wannabe' Russell Peters thing and it's not working for them. Even Russell has to find a different trick now, you know what I mean? Russell is writing newer and fresher thing as of now. What I like about Russell is that he took something that nobody had done and he did it. I can't even compare myself to him. We are like the two cows on the opposite side of the roads. He is bringing an NRI perspective of India to the World and I am taking the Indian perspective of India to the NRIs in the World.

"There's no doubt that the British humour exceeds the American humour"
The British humour borders on higher level of rudeness and higher level of sarcasm and to pull that off, you need higher level of intelligence. So you can actually get away with much more edgy and offensive material in the British style of humour as its more dead-pan. I think the written humour is much more important in the British humour than the spoken word. Then when you see Snatch, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Rock N Rolla, and the many more edgy gritty cinema, the humour is insane.

“My company ‘Weird Ass Comedy’ has written six movies that’ll be made with different banners in the next two years” It’s a weird space I am in. I’m doing stand up, Read More">films and on top of that I cannot ignore my comedy rock band called Alien Chutney. Then there’s a comedy ‘bharta’ in the formRead More

"My company 'Weird Ass Comedy' has written six movies that'll be made with different banners in the next two years"
It's a weird space I am in. I'm doing stand up, films and on top of that I cannot ignore my comedy rock band called Alien Chutney. Then there's a comedy 'bharta' in the form of Cardinal Bengans that is India's foremost Improvisational Comedy troupe. I've also got a company called 'Weird Ass Comedy', its India's first comedy content company. We've written six movies and now with different banners, they'll all get made over the next two years.

"I will give credit to films like Pyaar Ka Punchnama, Shaitan, FALTU, Band Baaja Baaraat"
I'm very optimistic but I'll also be practical. You have to believe that a film like Delhi Belly can be successful without an Aamir Khan with a smaller budget and that's when you know that the new genre has opened up. I will give credit to films like Pyaar Ka Punchnama and Shaitan and to Band Baaja Baarat. Even FALTU did well with a whole new cast, small budget and fresher content. That's what I am trying to do with comedy.

"Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, Adam Sandler and Ben Stiller are the top 5 comedy bankable stars in Hollywood as of now"
What opened my eyes was a newspaper that I was reading back in L.A. six months ago. I have an agent in L.A. with whom I was supposed to discuss a few gigs. That's when I came across the top 5 bankable 'comedy' stars in Hollywood. They are Tom Cruise, Johnny Depp, Brad Pitt, Adam Sandler and Ben Stiller. They did their own thing, created a brand of comedy and made young, fresh comedy content. I want to be doing the same thing.

“My first stand up was at the India Habitat Centre that was sold out” I’ve done gigs on cruise liners between Houston, Read More">Caribbean and Mexico to pubs to lots of places. Didn’t get paid but everything was free. Food to women (laughs). Then I’d go to London and do gigs at the local clubs. ThenRead More

"My first stand up was at the India Habitat Centre that was sold out"
I've done gigs on cruise liners between Houston, Caribbean and Mexico to pubs to lots of places. Didn't get paid but everything was free. Food to women (laughs). Then I'd go to London and do gigs at the local clubs. Then I came to Mumbai for my vacation where Vidyun Singh from the India Habitat Centre gave me a show that went 'sold out'. She gave me a 120 seater hall to do stand up which eventually had to be a 580 seater because it got double booked.

"I left all my plates, luggage, 'chaddis' like it was and never thought of going back to America"
I again came down to Mumbai and I met Pradeep Guha, did a gig with him that had some eminent Bollywood personalities. There was the Bachchan family sitting right under my nose and I performed for the first time in front of Bollywood personalities. Some guy came to me after and offered me a show on their new channel that they were launching called Zoom. He called me at VT Station the next day. I walk into VT Station where this guy and Pradeep were waiting for me. I demanded a heavy pay for the show that was offered to me. They were OK with it. I came to Bandra by 11.30. Found an apartment by 1.30. Went to Delhi, packed my suitcase and came back to Mumbai in a week. I never went back to America after that. I had an apartment there for five years. I left all my plates, luggage, 'chaddis' like it was and never thought of going back. The only time I went back was to shoot Badmaash Company.

"A girl once told me that the only way she'd sleep with me was on the stage"
A girl once said to me, 'You are sexy, funny and good looking but the only way I'd sleep with you is if it was on this stage.' That was hilarious. I am in one of those professions where who you see on stage could not be further from who I am. I mean, I am an a******e, I am really rude, offensive and a b*****d, filthy, vulgar, abrasive, etc etc. I think a lot of people who'd actually hate me after the show would be my audience. But I am not just that guy. I am placid in real life.